Shifter By Christmas Read online

  A surge of hunger and desire took him fast. It was strong, overwhelming, shocking in its intensity. She clung to his shoulders to keep from moving away. He wouldn’t have let her. His arms came around her and banded her against him, mouth moving on hers and consuming her. Dominating her. Farris opened on a sigh, his tongue slipping inside to explore every inch of her.

  He swore at himself for pressing her when she still wasn’t comfortable with him. It was madness to continue. He’d experienced passion, heady and quick, along with desire and frenzy that came from his animal’s natural sex drive. He’d been demanding, hungry, and irreverent with his partners in the past. But the moment she opened for him, he lost control. It might as well have been his first kiss. That was his last thought before his brain switched to off. No one had ever responded to his kisses like this.

  Then his hands were in her hair and his lips moving endlessly over hers, exploring and tasting when the earth tipped.

  He should stop. He couldn’t stop. One more taste, he promised himself even as he craved more, and then he would give her the space she needed.

  “I wanted this to happen,” she admitted, the sound low and pleading when she broke the kiss. “You have no idea how much.”

  Lakota rested his head against hers. Trying to breathe. Even with the woodsmoke tinting the air in the cabin, her scent came to him. Flowers beneath the snow. Springtime in the middle of winter. He moaned. “But you can’t imagine how it can be real. How anything that feels this good can be the truth.”

  Farris, her body warm and giving, sighed. “It feels real to me.”

  Lakota almost lost control.

  He swept her closer until she was on her tiptoes, then using her off-kilter balance, maneuvered them both to the blanket-covered cushions of the couch. “I’m afraid if I wait any longer you’ll panic and run. I’ll never survive if you do.”

  “Then don’t let go of me,” she said softly.

  With her back against the cushions, his hand reached out to caress her skin, tracing a path down her neck and stopping just above the inviting swell of her breasts. It was delicious. She hadn’t been touched like this since…no, she couldn’t remember the last time, although she was sure no one in her life had ever ignited such a bonfire inside of her. The feeling was heady and sensuous and made her want to rip off her clothes and dance naked. Maybe it was the way Lakota looked at her. Like she was someone worth knowing. Worth loving.

  He pushed the fabric of her shirt aside to expose her body to his gaze. The chill in the air combined with the steamy waves of heat from the fire brought a rush of feeling, her head spiraling up and her breasts aching. Lakota tugged at her bra and cupped a breast, massaging the soft weight in his palm.

  “Do you feel what I feel, Farris?” he asked, his voice husky. Aching. “I want you to give yourself to me. Now, tonight. Tomorrow.” His lips fell on her chin, her cheeks, her temple, each one light as a feather yet leaving a brand in their wake. “For as long as we have together.”

  “Are you trying to alpha me?”

  He laughed against her skin before burying his face in her neck. “Am I what?”

  “Trying to alpha me. Impose your will on me and make me do whatever you want.”

  “The thought has merit…”

  “Lakota!”

  “My father is the alpha of our pack, which means his word is law. I’m a middle child. Odds are good that unless I want to leave home and form my own pack, I will never be a true alpha. Although dominating you sounds thrilling.”

  “Would…would you like to?”

  “Dominate you? Be your alpha?” He trailed his fingers between her breasts, drawing her shirt lower, surprised at the offer. “Yes.”

  Her eyes went dark, heated, and it was a battle not to grab her and rip her clothes off. There was such desire between them. Lakota wanted to gorge himself on her. Her body responded to his need with a flash of wetness between her legs. He was close enough to smell it.

  She wiggled beneath him and arched upward. Eyes closed, she moaned when he took her nipple into his mouth. His hands moved to her wrists and brought them both above her head, the liquid pull of his mouth drawing all manner of strange noises from her.

  His body was hard. Heavy. Stirring in obvious, urgent demand.

  He sensed the emotions pouring through her the moment his fingers touched her skin, the way his firm lips hinted at impatience when they slanted over hers. It was the beginning of something big.

  Her touch triggered all manner of needs inside of him, and Lakota stood on the edge of a volcano. The heat was enough to singe the hair on his body and set fire to his insides. His hands slipped beneath her shirt and roamed wherever they pleased. Savoring the slender line of her neck, her smooth skin and the quick tremors of her reactions, he felt his need for her grow. His need to touch and possess and dominate. It was his animal instinct rising up to demand he claim her. His mouth came back to hers and when she caught her breath, he lost his mind.

  Then her hands were on him, shoving his clothing aside, unable to wait for skin on skin contact. Were the windows steaming? He couldn’t tell. His mind was filled with fantasies of pulling her to the floor, shredding her clothing, and taking her until one or both of them screamed in passion.

  No other woman would do, he understood that now, losing any semblance of control. Her scent called to him and his body throbbed, just like that. He blocked out the cool wind blowing into the house from the door he’d failed to close all the way. Blocked out the snow and everything but her solid weight in front of him, her heat and her strength. Her breasts brushing up on his chest and the blood rushing through him.

  He could hear their hearts pounding in tandem.

  Her shirt was on the floor, followed quickly by her pants. She’d been forced to rinse out her clothes with hot water and soap rather than a washing machine, and although he knew she was a little hesitant about baring herself for him, his mind was a haze of physical hunger. Demanding to possess her.

  His tongue stroked lower as his fingers threaded down past her belly button. When his teeth nipped her neck and throat, she groaned and pressed closer. It didn’t take long for her own hands to reach out. Grasping the reins of control was unorthodox for Farris, he knew. Still, he hoped to give her enough confidence with his own reaction to have her feeling comfortable. If she wanted to alpha him, he would not mind.

  His eyes closed when she wrapped her hands around his erection. Both hands. Her mouth curved in a slow, feminine smile before she bent down, tongue flicking out to taste his skin. She murmured a sound of pleasure and her lips brushed against the crown.

  It was almost too much. His muscles contracted and when his teeth came together he might have chipped a few. He closed his eyes to savor the demands of his body and the way Farris instinctively met them all. She was like nothing and no one else. She was liquid fire and he was drowning in her. A slow burn spread from his chest down his flat stomach and lower when she continued to torment him, her tongue teasing and dancing over his hardness until he wanted to grab her.

  When she sucked him halfway down her throat, he decided he couldn’t take it anymore, grabbing her by the elbows and hauling her up until she wrapped her legs around his waist.

  “Lakota!”

  He silenced her with a kiss and turned his attention to the giant four-poster bed he hadn’t gotten to try with her yet.

  “I want to have you begging for me,” he said against her lips.

  “I believe that’s doable.”

  He thrust home and felt her clench around him, temporarily losing his mind. For a moment he couldn’t move and simply stayed where he was, trapped in the sensations. The scratch of her fingers against his back, accompanied by a slight mewling sound, had him spurring to action. His hips pistoned. Grabbing her legs, he moved them tighter around his waist.

  The orgasm took him quickly. Too quickly, he thought later, thrusting home and feeling the eruption begin in his lower abdomen. She’d think him unab
le to please her if he kept this up. He dropped down, chills taking him, and pressed his thumb to the tiny button below her pelvis. While his own aftershocks raged, he watched her breath hitch, her eyes close, and her head tilt back. Then she tightened internally and the motion nearly pushed him over the edge again.

  There’d be no begging this time.

  “Wow, I—”

  He stopped her words with a kiss. “Hush,” he said against her lips. “Enjoy.”

  Hours later, Lakota held her in his arms and felt like he could fly. It was the strangest feeling, he thought, his fingers stroking up and down Farris’s arm. No one was ever going to take her away from him. He savored the feel of her skin, his hand coming up and drawing her closer to his chest, his grip unbreakable.

  His mind reflected on the years it had taken him to get here and all the rocky detours and gulfs and chasms he’d had to navigate. In no way had he thought himself ready for such an intimate connection with a woman. Content with one-night stands, he chose instead to focus on work and push down any notions his father or brothers would deem too “romantic.” The surfing fell in the same category. He blocked out his own wants under the oppressive umbrella of needs of his community. A few more years and, if he were still single, his family would choose a mate for him. How fortunate he’d found her first.

  His blood surged and he nuzzled Farris’s cheek. There was no one else for him. There never would be.

  “I want to know everything about you,” she admitted, her voice sated and soft. “I want to know the details of your life.”

  “The details of my life aren’t interesting.”

  “I beg to differ. You’re a shifter. Damn.” She sat up on her elbows and stared at him with an incredulous grin. “I just had sex with a shifter! It’s like a movie. Except I’m the star.”

  “Not one of your horror movies,” he put in before she could continue.

  “More like an erotic fantasy.” Her grin widened. “It’s a lot to wrap my head around. Yesterday I was normal.”

  The intimacy had him open and willing to share. “I highly doubt you’ve ever been normal. I’ll start off by saying things aren’t always easy with my life. I work for my father at his sawmill although I don’t want to. I stay around to help my family even though I’m desperate to leave.”

  “You want to escape? Where would you go?”

  “Anywhere. I’m not picky. I want to get out and explore. But I worry about what would happen to my family if I leave.”

  “I’m sure they’d be fine without you.”

  He shook his head. “My father doesn’t agree. He’s made it pretty clear my place is here, with the rest of the pack. There’s a risk of excommunication although I’m fairly certain it’s a myth. There are so few naturally born shifters anymore they can’t afford to lose one of their own.”

  “I guess every person and place has their own issues. I thought things were bad where I grew up. My mother and father were at each other’s throats half the time and delighted in putting my sister and me in the middle of their bullshit. I found writing as an escape.” She shifted her position and propped her head on her hand to stare at him. “I used to jot little stories in a blue notebook and carry it around with me. When I went to college for journalism it was natural to supplement my love for writing with photography. Like taking photos helped solidify what I saw in my head, or a concept for a story.”

  “How did you get mixed up with the bad guy?”

  “The bad guy…oh! My ex-boyfriend—”

  “I don’t want to know his name.”

  “Okay.” She blew out a breath. “He-who-shall-not-be-named pulled me under his spell because, for the first time in my life, I felt like he saw me. The real me, not what he wanted to see, not how he could use me. But it turns out he was exactly like everyone else. Out for himself and what he could get. We started the magazine together, you know. Had equal shares of stock, or so I thought. He sold his part of the stocks, which ended up to be way more than half thanks to his sneaky paperwork. It left me reeling. And reminded me of one thing. I was still not good enough. Not even for basic respect. To this day he has never owned up to what he did.”

  His heart flipped over in his chest. What could he do to make her feel better? To help her realize that she was worth way more than the jerks she’d dated before? “I might have a few stories of my own. When I was in high school, I was supposed to meet a girl for a date. She sent her friend instead, to tell me she wasn’t coming because she’d found someone better. At least she gave me the courtesy, I guess, of not standing me up completely, but wouldn’t it have been better not to agree to meet me at all?”

  At last, her stiffness melted into a pseudo-smile. “Is that where the oh-so-delightful sourpuss from the hostel comes into play?”

  He stifled a laugh. “No, the history of Susan is a story for another time. I don’t want to bring her in here between us, not now.”

  “Is there anyone you would like to bring in here?”

  “What are you offering?” he replied, waggling his eyebrows.

  She rolled over and offered him a wink. “In terms of conversation, I mean. I feel driven to learn just about everything there is to know about you.”

  “Well, I broke my arm when I was in third grade, I’m deathly allergic to cinnamon, and I have a terrible fear…of peanut butter.”

  “Oh come on. You’re making things up to impress me.”

  “How would my fear of peanut butter impress you? Do you know how much mold can grow in a jar? It’s insane. Do you know what else I’m afraid of?”

  “No, but I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”

  “You. Leaving me.”

  Her chuckle was dry. “I can’t for the life of me figure out why,” she muttered. “I mean, you don’t know me that well, and it’s not like we’ve made any kind of commitment to each other.”

  It gave him pause. A little nonplussed, he braced a hand on a pillow. “What if I tell you that I want to? Make a commitment to you, I mean. Something I’ve never done with anyone before.”

  Her eyes glimmered with tears she held back. Tears? “Then I’d say you were full of shit,” she replied heatedly.

  “Is it so hard to believe?”

  “Yes. Yes, it is.”

  “I’ve told you about my past, about my inability to sustain a relationship. It was because none of them were right for me,” he said evenly. “It’s different with you.”

  “You know, there have been a few people in my past who’ve said the same thing, and it ended up being a line. I’ve grown a little tired of hearing it over and over with the same outcome each time.”

  “It isn’t a line with me,” he insisted.

  “You’ll pardon me if I don’t believe you.”

  “You think I can’t commit to you?”

  “I don’t think any man can commit to me. It’s nothing against you personally.” She dragged the covers around her and shivered, then lifted her chin.

  “Stop being so hard on yourself. No, wait a minute, we aren’t done talking about this,” he said when she rolled over.

  “I say we are” was her muffled response.

  “Are you going to run away every time I try to have a deep and meaningful conversation with you?” He would have expected almost any other reaction than that.

  “I’m making no promises.”

  He wanted to argue but held the words back. Her shoulders were shaking and she looked pale. Tired. A little too fragile for his liking. “I’m saying I don’t want you to leave me. I’m saying it out loud. No matter where you go in this cabin you can’t ignore it.”

  “Why, Lakota?” She let him tug her so that she was on her back with her face tilted toward him. Eyes glimmering. “Why are you so adamant about keeping me here? Getting me to like you? I need to know your game plan.”

  “There’s no game plan. I swear to you, Farris. You have to believe me. I can’t lie to you, okay?”

  “Everyone lies.”

 
; “Not me, not to you. I am physically incapable.” She was ready to shut the conversation down entirely, but he gestured with his hands, challenging her to continue.

  She opened her mouth as if to speak and ended up just lifting her hands above her head. Letting them fall down on the sheets. “Like I’d believe you.”

  “You have to.”

  “Bullshit again,” she retorted. “I call bullshit to all of it.”

  “I can’t lie to you because you and I are meant to be together. You’re my lifemate.”

  Chapter 7

  Oops. He hadn’t meant to let that nugget of information slip, from the look on his face. Judging by the strangling feeling taking hold of her, she hadn’t been ready to receive it, either. The dream she’d been living in popped. Reality interceded in a desperate and painful surge.

  So much for afterglow.

  “I’m…what? I’m…no. No way. You are such a bullshitter!” She reached out as if to slap him.

  He caught her hand with his, letting her go when she pulled away. “Didn’t I just explain how it works? Weren’t you listening?” He sighed and flopped onto his back, his arm flung over his eyes. Like he couldn’t face her reaction. “I’m sorry. Please ignore what I said. We can rewind.” A series of crazed grunts reached him and when he blinked at her, he could see she was on the verge of a meltdown. Lower lip quivering and shoulders tensed up to her ears. “Sweetie, no. Calm down. Take—”

  “Don’t tell me to breathe,” she interrupted hotly, wiping at her eyes. “Don’t talk to me. How can you say something like that?” She could feel herself shutting down and tried her hardest not to let it happen. No good could come from closing herself off and curling up into a little ball, although that was exactly what she wanted to do. Curl up and hide from the reality, the gravity, of the situation. Her chin came up. “You have a lot of nerve saying those things to me after our beautiful night together.”

  “Nerve!” Lakota pursed his lips and studied her. Judging his next move. “How can it be nerve if I’m telling you the truth? I’m sorry, I should have found a better way to let you know, I admit. Now there’s no shoving the cat back into the bag. You’re my mate, fashioned by fate for me and only me, and I knew it the first time I met you. What else can I say?”